Tonight was a fairly quiet night at work. I enjoyed this as it allowed me to chill out after what seems like one long day of Christmas season. I also enjoyed being able to chat with Dave, a guy who became a regular drinker in my place about a year ago. I have a lot in common with Dave, we are the same age and therefore have a lot of common interests and experiences and I have come to consider him a friend. A friend who I enjoy talking to.
Tonight Dave was talking to me whilst text messaging a female friend. She was planning on coming to see him in the new year and given what I had been told of their previous relationship it seemed pretty clear what she was visiting for.
He told me how the messaging had gone from one thing to another. As in she was flip flopping around the subject of sleeping with him. She appeared to be changing the ‘terms’ of their arrangement.
Now this is none of my business, their are both a consenting pair of adults and I certainly am not in any place to judge. However Dave came out with a line that I am grabbing hold off as my new years ‘resolution’. Not that I normally go for that type of life changing new year/new me promises.
That line: “I’m not negotiating”
This, I think, is just fantastic and I can see many times and conversations where I could use such a phrase.
- A customer who has had to much to drink but wants more will sometimes try ‘the downgrade’.
e.g. “Can I have a pint?”
“No, I think you’ve had enough to drink”
“Can I have a half pint then?”
“NO, I’M NOT NEGOTIATING”
- A situation, for example, ‘can I work overtime’ – “NO, I’M NOT NEGOTIATING”
- Plans for a night out- “Oh but we can go there first and go where you want to go after”- “NO I’M NOT NEGOTIATING”
- Should I manage to get a date. Will I see the film I want to watch or give in on the latest ‘chick flick’ to ensure a successful date. No I will be watching the next Expendables movie or whatever Marvel has released at the time. Because “NO, I’M NOT NEGOTIATING”.
The last few years I have dealt with people taking advantage of me and I have dealt with people whom frankly don’t deserve my friendship let alone favours. The difference in me now is that I have made it through to the end of another year with my eyes open a little wider.
Everyone has a mate called Dave. Tonight I’d like to thank my mate Dave for one simple phrase- “NO, I’M NOT NEGOTIATING”.