Who Am I ???

Who am I?

who am i

I am I…

I’ll be honest I don’t know what that means. I’d like to think I know myself very well, I guess I’m just not that good at expressing it.

Currently I am

  • 32 with a month left before 33. (3weeks)  Now 33
  • I’m currently single and actually really happy to be
  • I really enjoy being left alone
  • To that extent the cinema on my own is one of my favourite pass times
  • When I enjoy a certain thing I get really, really involved
  • Things can really annoy me but I care very little about most
  • I love a good rant

Clinging on to these three weeks


I was born old, or at least older than my years would say. I’ve always had a level head even during my ‘wild’ early 20s.

I think maybe I’ve always been a bit of a cynic. This is a good quality as far as I’m concerned but as my body catches up with my mind I’m starting to wish for my youth back. My once long, beautiful, mullet styled hair-do is now but a distant memory. It started really declining at about 27/28 to the point now where if I let it grow more than 2 weeks it looks as though I’ve shaved a ridiculous exclamation mark on top of my head. But I’ve figured it out. Its not falling out, I have become a victim of gravity. My once long Wolverine main is being dragged down through the top of my head and out, mostly, through my nose.

My once golden flamed beard now looks as though somebody has attempted to put out the flames with a foamy white extinguisher. My facial hair skipped four levels of grey and went straight to ghostly white.


My goodness I’m clinging on to the next three weeks. 33 seems to be such a nothing age and I don’t think I have the motivation to make it something.

Relationship Status


No, really, I’m so happy being single. Even if I do get interest (which yeah, I’m falling over women throwing themselves at me) I don’t notice it or find a reason as to why it’s the worst idea since the Michael Jackson Children’s Ward.

This I feel is the result of the decade of my 20’s going from one ‘relationship’ to another.  I wasn’t a good man, even when I tried to be. I knew at the time why this was and I am just a little ashamed of most of my behaviour. But then again even when I tried and managed to be ‘a good fella’ it all went terribly wrong.

Mother: “You’re gonna die alone you know”

Me: “Yeah probably, but I’m actually Ok with that”

Mother: “You’re too much like me”

Me: Suddenly started questioning my parents impending 35 year wedding anniversary.


not listening

I love my friends, I really do. Over the years I have whittled them down to just the good few. But… I like my own company. Have you ever noticed that the more you speak to someone the more you end up repeating yourself? I have noticed many times with a few people who I have an awful amount of time for that talking to them is that comfy jumper. The conversation has become so repetitive that I could do it in my sleep. And I hate, hate, hate repetition.

I really enjoy my own company, I think it’s probably a stage in life that everyone has to reach. A trip to the movies is NOT WEIRD as a single 30 something year old man. Just the other day I went to watch The Expendables 3 on my own. But was a really alone? 12:40 in the afternoon, a long cue to buy tickets, every person (bar one Mother and child) was an over 30yr old male. I felt assured that the only tickets being sold for Step up 5 were being sold to the mother and child.

How the first 4 Step up movies had past me by I don’t know but as I made my way up the escalator with my popcorn I knew that screen 5 was where I needed to be. Screen 5 doubling up for the next few hours as the safe house almost any single bloke in the area with free time found themselves. I wasn’t alone, I’d found brotherhood.

The things I like I really like. Everything else does not exsist.


Doctor Who is now in charge of certain parts of my life, I’ve grown up with it and I will grow old with it. As a young child I remember watching it with my father. The 3rd Doctor was my first Doctor and I feel very lucky that my dad shared that with me. My parents had me when they were very early in their 20’s and to this extent my father still had his boy-geek personalty fully intact. By the time my two younger brothers arrived he had somewhat grown out of it and I feel genuinely lucky to have been around first to share that with him.

What do you want for Christmas/Birthday Paul?  This question hardly ever gets asked. When I’ve run out of Sonic Screwdrivers and TARDIS models to be brought there’s always Doctor Who Mr Potato Heads and Dalek Egg cups.

What I don’t have time for anymore- Exciting shower gel, by the time I’ve run a bath, had a coffee and got in said bath I am awake enough. I don’t need to be slapped all over my body with mint, exciting, refreshing mint. It’s a wash to clean myself before leaving the house. What it’s not is a fun filled trip to a theme park with a brand new mint scented roller-coaster of fun to confuse your body by not knowing if you are cold or not.

Christmas German markets: This is a real hot button. I F**king hate them. We have spent thousands of years developing indoors to protect us from the winter. Why the Hell do people think ‘I know what I need, to drink sh*t beer in the cold’.

There any many, many more things that annoy me. Many more.

  •  Tea-spoons
  • Ironing
  • Grammar Nazi’s
  • Internet bandwagons
  • Mass bandwagons
  • The phrase ‘Smile’
  • The phrase ‘You can’t say that’
  • Deodorant (it isn’t making you smell good my friend)
  • Why antiperspirant isn’t the standard
  • 17 blade razor upgrades. There has to be a point when you say that’s enough blades for me
  • Good customer service- Or prying customer servers.
  • Adverts for ‘Donkey Charities’

This could go on for some time so I’m going to leave it with the Donkey.



Hi my name is Paul.

I am exactly who I need to be.



63 thoughts on “Who Am I ???

  1. Reblogged this on Suzie81 Speaks and commented:
    This is P, or Paul – my best friend. After a year of listening to me waffle on about my blog and being inspired by the amazing comments you guys left for him the other day, he’s decided to start his own. Make him welcome!

  2. Hilarious post! You sound like a great bloke and I definitely want to read more. But seriously, hating German Christmas markets?? They’re a fabulous excuse to stuff yourself with chocolate covered fruit and tasty bratwurst and drink copious amounts of Glühwein! I’m German, so I’m biased of course 🙂

    1. Thank you very much.

      The Christmas market thing- ten years ago it was a lovely ‘oh this is different’ but a decade later it’s got bigger and bigger and make walking through my home town a nightmare.
      And I don’t get the point in standing in the cold when there are perfectly good buildings with heating.
      That and I’m more of a vodka redbull kinda guy lol.

      1. Yes, the hordes of people that you have to navigate is awful. You already need to come drunk, it’s almost like being in a bad night club. I have given up entirely on Christmas markets anywhere other than in Germany. The one we have in Dublin is an embarrassment, same with the Oktoberfest. I get your point in regards to how humans have evolved and built warm shelters only to spend time in the frickin’ cold! Which is why I don’t get people doing coastal walks in the winter. I just stay inside and hibernate for 4 months. And I’ll have a vodka redbull with that 🙂

      2. Coastal walks in the winter?? I’m kinda glad I’ve never heard of that before. It sounds awful.
        The market we have in Birmingham is let down mainly by it being in Birmingham and therefore attracts people from Birmingham.
        I am one of them but my goodness, too many in one space lowers the whole IQ of the Midlands.

      3. It is and hardcore hikers are still trying to convince you that “the fresh breeze will dust off your cobwebs and make you fit”. I’m fine with my cobwebs, thanks! Oh yeah, Birmingham.. I convinced my partner at the time to go there from Brighton for a weekend trip because I missed my German Christmas markets. When we got there it was a real let down. Our highlight of that weekend actually was an amazing curry in the Balti Triangle!

      4. I don’t approve a curry for one reason. It’s said it tastes better if you leave it for a day. I don’t agree with leaving anything for any amount of time for it to taste better.

        I like my cobwebs as well, it would take the Indiana Jones of hikers to convince me to dust any of them away.

  3. Hi Paul, I am Sheena (ok, not really). I love and agree with all of your annoyance list. Welcome to the blogosphere!

  4. Welcome to WordPress, Paul 🙂 Generally, “smug marrieds” who tell “singletons” that the clock is running out are only jealous… and you should tell your mother on a purely philosophical note that we ALL die alone 😀 Now I’m off to lick my wounds – you really DON’T like grammar Nazis? Sniff.

    1. Thank you.
      Yes I have come across many of these “smug marrieds”- I also know who they turn to when it all goes wrong or when they need a party.
      To be honest I get most of who I am from my mother. I know that whilst most people would like to die surrounded by loved ones I personally can’t think of anything more selfish or worse. She is pretty much of the same opinion.
      And yeah… Grammar Nazis. Only because I used to be one. I’m slightly more forgiving nowadays because I know some people can’t help it and autocorrect makes people look like idiots.
      As I said to my friend the other day, “unless you were the person who proof read Mein Kampf then you aren’t a grammar Nazi”.

      Thanks for the welcome 🙂

  5. I’m a huge Dr.Who fan as well, Paul. Yep, I started with the third Doctor as well and am so looking forward to the new series starting on Saturday 🙂
    Welcome to WordPress and I hope we get to see some Dr. Who posts from you.
    Those weeping Angels have taken top spot from the Dalaks as far as I’m concerned. They seriously scare me and I’m so glad they are not on your ‘things that annoy you’ list.

    1. Hello Hugh. The only thing that DW could ever get anywhere near my annoy me list would be people who don’t get it.
      Where will you be watching on Saturday?
      I’ve opted for cinema and losing out on a nights wages, and yes, yes it’s totally worth it.

      1. Oh I totally agree with you Paul. I’ll be watching it from the comfort of my own living room as I can not stand the thought of anybody talking over it while it is on.
        I only wish I had been in Cardiff a few weeks back when it premiered there. I hear there were hundreds and hundreds of people there for it.

      2. It’s really not a problem people talking over it. Because everyone there knows. I saw the 50th at the cinema and nobody dared. Plus it had a really nice and proper British round of applause at the end.

      3. I don’t want to show off. But… I have seen it. And yes, YES P.C is amazing.
        No spoilers there because well he was always going to be. Reminded me a little of Tom Baker.
        That’s me being late for work on Saturday for the next few months.

      4. I once bumped into Tom Baker in a pub and was so shocked to see him standing there, that the words refused to come out!
        I’m know P.C won’t be a let down.
        I hope Suzie is as enthusiastic about Dr.Who as what we are, when you two meet up 🙂

      5. She’s not lol. It’s actually got to the point of almost banning me mentioning it.
        About 10yrs ago Silvester McCoy was in my pub with Nigel from eastenders. I was so blown away that The Doctor was in the same building as me I had to get one of the girls I worked with to ask for an autograph.

      6. lol, at least you did better than me by getting an autograph. I think I frightened Tom off, as he didn’t stay long and that’s the last I saw of him until he appeared on the programme again – wow that was one great ending and I was so pleased it was him.

      7. Who else could it have been. The point where you heard his voice just before you saw him there was no oxygen left in the cinema as everybody had taken a huge gasp of breath.

      8. I was in tears! Really I was.
        I seem to be taking up vast amounts of space in your comments section, Paul. I’m over on twitter if you want to continue this conversation there – @RobertHughes05. If not, then I look forward to reading your future posts on your blog.
        Welcome aboard the big blogging ship 🙂

      9. Space is all relative. I have got a twitter but stopped using it last year. I feel I may be starting it again soon.
        And thank you. I think I’m gonna like it here.

  6. I love your honesty and the way you are so comfortable with yourself. It is very refreshing. Also, you remind me A LOT of my husband and one of my daughters who are both INTJs on the Myers Briggs Personality Type Indicator. I especially liked the graphic you used indicating your relationship status…too funny! 🙂

  7. Boy I have been waiting to read you my whole life – when I heard about you from Suzie I thought maybe she was making it up – she can do that. But no, you’re really real. You like being alone. If I’m not alone, I’m f’ing miserable and I don’t do miserable and hey just because they’ve been together 35 years doesn’t mean a thing – I’m old enough to be your mother – my son will be 34 next month – and he’s good weird too ……… you my friend just got a big follow for the rest of your life. Welcome aboard – it’s one hell of a ride.

  8. You just had to say Doctor Who and I would have followed you lol. And whoever says frowning takes more muscle effort can tell me that from their wrinkled up face from smiling to my smooth face from not.

      1. I’ve been in the Tardis you know. I have an actual sonic screwdriver. I have a tardis onesie, wine cooler and salt n pepper shakers and will soon be getting a tardis tattoo. Haha is it unfollow time?

      2. No it’s time to tell you to wait until I do my planned post ‘Me and my Doctor a life through objects’.
        4 sonics, salt & pepper shakers, Dalek egg cup, Mr Potatwho Head, Mini fridge, money box, long scarf, Dalek coin, pocket watch, cufflinks, shoes, etc etc.

      3. Phone case, books, door hangers….. Ok I’m giving away the content of a future post, or is that a past post? Sorry I get them confused, it never happens in the right order. All wibbley wobbly.

        Nice to meet you lol

  9. Hi Paul. Welcome to the world of writing. For a newcomer to the blog world, you write really well. Good honest, grounded,down to earth writing.

  10. If my husband were a blog reader, he’d be here on yours. I will enjoy on his behalf. Welcome to the WordPress family. If you have any thoughts of leaving, let them go. You are trapped now. 🙂 Just kidding! (or am I?!)

  11. Reblogged this on MrPolly and commented:

    I feel that this week will be a week of looking back over older posts. That’s not so bad, it will give me time to collect new thoughts and who knows maybe, new followers.

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